FAKE NEWS: Frustrated shopper can only find jeans without rips

FAKE NEWS: Frustrated shopper can only find jeans without rips

By Isaac Garcia Posted: December 20, 2019

Torn jeans are a staple in modern fashion and crucial to the look of many “hip” youngsters. So imagine one frustrated shopper surprise when at the store all he could find were jeans that were – get this – fully intact. No thanks.

The shopper, teenager Isidro Barton, was walking through the store looking for torn jeans, but much to his chagrin, no such jeans were in view. Barton supposedly walked around the store for 45 minutes. To the youth of America, this is basically an eternity.

“So like I was just like looking for some torn jeans to go with this sick Supreme jacket I got, but like I couldn’t find any. How are people gonna know I’m cool if my jeans aren’t torn?” said Barton. “I looked for like for a super long time. This has never happened to me before and I felt personally attacked.”

Barton became very “triggered” by the incident. He is considering suing the store for mental anguish unless improvements are made.

The store owner, Natalia Cannon, was reportedly confused by the incident.

“The customer walked in the store reeking of Axe Body Spray then after a little less than an hour later, he started to get visibly angry so I asked what was wrong,” stated Cannon.

“Then he pulled out his phone and said he was videotaping me and not to touch him, then he just ran out of the store making a big scene.”

For Cannon this is an isolated case of a disgruntled customer.

“Of course I’m not gonna sell those weird jeans,” said Cannon. “He’s the first person to ever make a big deal about pants in this store.”

Cannon is frustrated with the issue as well.

“Just go to Hot Topic,” said Cannon. “Who knew pants shopping could cause such an ordeal, I mean it seems weird, but that’s what comes from boomers and Gen X colliding.”

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