By Dani Ricker, Karen Esparza, Rylee Mathis, Posted February 19, 2014
Gather ‘round children and get ready for more controversial opinions, ‘cause it’s Lowry Code. First we discuss Valentine’s Day: either you were a single, hot mess or floating on cloud nine with your significant other. Second, it’s the kids that are “too cool for school” and everything else, we talk hipsters. And lastly we give our views on the number one reason for break-ups, our good old friends, home wreckers.
Topic one: Valentine’s Day
Karen: I’ve got nothing against Valentine’s Day, itself, but the way people behave on that day makes me want to barf. I’m not interested in what your “other half” gave you, so don’t bring that stupid teddy bear to every class. If you are single, embrace it and hang with other single friends. Trust me, it’s not the end of the world to be alone on Valentine’s Day, also it’s a pretty good excuse to eat obscene amounts of chocolate.
Dani: I hate Valentine’s Day. It’s a stupid, pointless holiday made up by card and chocolate companies. I don’t care how much you love your boyfriend. If you really did love him you wouldn’t wait until February to show it. There’s another 364 days in a year to prove your ‘love’. So stop.
Rylee: Valentine’s Day can either be really exciting, or really depressing depending on your relationship status. If you’ve got a significant other this year, flaunt it. If the single ladies can’t handle the V-Day blues with unreasonable amounts of chocolate and a solo movie night, they deserve to be sad.
Topic two: Hipsters
Karen: Hipsters are a paradox, they undo themselves. A hipster is a person who hates and rejects anything mainstream, but being a hipster is mainstream, so they unravel their own existence. A “true” hipster denies that he’s a hipster because he believes he can’t be categorized because he’s just that complex, but it’s simple, he is a hipster. For any further clarification on what a hipster is, please address all your questions towards Brycen Prokasky, the epitome of a hipster.
Dani: Rylee and Karen have two different definitions of the word “hipster”. Every time they bring up this topic I get really angry and want to say mean things. I think I’ll just sit this round out.
Rylee: The definition of “hipster” (according to Google) is a person who follows the latest fashion trends. Think about that next time you put on those fake eye glasses and that multi-colored clip-on fox tail to go to the Verizon store to buy your 14th iPhone. You’re welcome.
Topic three: Home wreckers
Karen: Stop, just stop. Why do you want to steal other people’s boyfriends/girlfriends, it’s such bad karma, and we are all aware of what kind of person karma is. Respect other people’s relationships because it’s a courtesy you would want extended to you. Also, if a person cheats on their girlfriend/boyfriend with you, then you know they won’t have any second thoughts about cheating on you.
Dani: Is there even such thing as a ‘Home wrecker’ in high school?
Rylee: Ah, home wreckers. The bane of insecure women’s love lives. Seriously though, we’re in high school and chances are when that grungy guy you think you’re in love with cheats on you or is “stolen” from you, it’s really not going to matter in the long run.