By Dani Ricker Posted February 18, 2015
“All I know is that I do not know anything.” No one from Lowry said that; Socrates said that. But it describes about 90 percent of the Lowry population. So you know, welcome to Heard in the Halls.
“So I was like ‘long story short, you’re beautiful, and I want your babies.’” Paa-leaseee. You’re in high school, you don’t want anyone’s babies.
I wish I could use emojis in these stories. Because you can’t say “paa-leaseee” without sticking a “talk to the hand” up.
“What I would do is, I would literally cover someone in papercuts, then literally put them in a bag of lemon juice, then when they got out, I would put them in salt.”
Okay, one, I don’t know what sparked this topic, but stop. You’re scaring me. And two, your overuse of the word “literally” is very unnecessary.
“He can’t be a freshman! He’s too hot to be a freshman!”
Goodness, am I glad we don’t base grade levels on hotness. I’d be stuck back in like fourth grade. All the kids my age would be like, “My school is filled with such beautiful people!” and I’d be like, “Yeah? Well, I have recess and a juice box, so who’s the real winner here!?”
“He’s the love of my life. Like, I’m pretty sure we’re soulmates.”
Hey, storytime! Do you know where the term “soulmate” comes from? It comes from a theory that Plato created. He believed that humans were originally born with four arms, four feet, two heads, et cetera. However, they were only born with one soul. Then, way back when, people were stupid and did a lot of bad things and angered the Greek gods, who then cursed all of the human race, splitting them in half and forcing them to wander this earth in search of their other half.
The more you know.
So anyways, chances of you finding your “other half” in your sophomore year of high school are unlikely, and you need to stop.
“Oh my gosh, it’s only high school!”
Hey man, I see where you’re coming from, but at the same time, isn’t that the worst part? I mean, it’s only high school.
Just a random thought for you.
Peace out, Lowry.
